To let go Or Not To let go?

Honestly I'm tired, tired of everyone moving ahead of me although we started almost the same time. Tired of not getting any result after trying different ways. Everytime i comfort myself saying don't worry do your best, grab every chance you come onto, try your best to create some opportunity. I hate to lie to myself, but those words are getting harder and harder to comfort me :(

Everytime i browse my friend's result, all i can describe 'Envy' what did i did wrong? Am i really not good? I wonder sigh..

And when i think bout the future its really scary, as times goes by its getting harder and harder to achieve my goals. So should i really let go of it and go for something else?

Im confuse and equally sad as this is the 1 thing i really love doing and there's time i really think i can see myself excelling in it. So should i just let the fire burnt out and treat it as something common? Sigh.. :(

Story..

This is a very short story bout someone special in my heart. Lets call her S. S is a cute gal, she likes to argue, like to be on the winning side and also very eager to know what im doing all the time haha. You can describe her a very feisty lil gal too. At times she can be very dead serious and sometimes she can be very funny and sometimes very shy. ^^

She may read this or she may not. But right now she's having a rough time with her work and the worst thing is i couldn't help :( My dear, I'm sorry that i can't do anything to help you with the trouble you're facing. Sometimes i just feel rather useless not being able to contribute anything.

Dear, I promise you that I'll try my best to make things work for us. No matter what happen i will not give up till i get what i dreamt of which is holding your hands and hearing you saying "I do" *Blushed*

"She's everything i wanted,
She is funny and she is cute,
She can be scary when she's angry,
She can be very caring too,
What a weird gal she is,

Having her in my life is wonderful,
She change my world,
She makes me feel alive,
She fills up my empty spaces,
What a weird gal she is,

I guess i've found,
Found someone who would walk by me,
Hold my hand and follow me all the way,
I love you!"

Thoughts~

Honestly I'm quite messy right now, sigh... everything i did seems wrong.. what ever i think is correct turns out the other way :(

Take photography as an instance, I thought i found a great partner that will work together to build our profile but too bad he's more interested in his gf than photography :(.

I've ask around how to charge for an assignment and i charge according to the market price, but it seems not anyone interested with it.. then i charge cheaper but end up being 'advice' because i didn't follow the market price .. again.. sigh :(

I saw someone posted that they r looking for dealers to sell their products.. i emailed them but no replied :(

Sigh someone i felt that there's so much obstacles infront of my :( Life is hard but c'mon can't i have a break? I'm not saying i gave up but i've source for so much opportunities but till now i still haven't see any light at the end of the road.

Just my personal ranting of what's going on with me lately.. somehow i can't just keep it inside of my.. its suffocating :(

What a year~

Woah.. it's almost the end of the first quarter of 2010. Lots of ups and downs during this period. For me I finally able to secure a new job which is a totally new environment for me which means i've need to start all over again. I've no problem with starting all over again, the only thing im worried bout is did i make the wrong choice again? Did i took the wrong road again? Questions and questions has been running in my head, you see I am not really a good decision maker, sometimes i tend to be rush and misout on some points. I've made a terrible decision by not leaving my current company earlier as I've seen the way this company is heading and its not going to benefit me anyway. Due to this I've wasted 3 years without accomplishing anything. Sigh.. I am terrified. Terrified that again I've made the wrong decision :(

I guess only time will tell whether i've made the correct decision or not. But for the time being I guess by going all out i will know if i've made the correct decision or not. Do wish me luck guys!

Thoughts

Its been sometime since i update this blog, well lots of things happened during this period. Sigh.. i'll be slowly updating it into here..

Buffet @ G-Hotel

A few weeks ago, my company organize a team building dinner for my team. The location of the dinner is G-Hotel. It was really a wow for me when i reach the hotel's coffee house. There were numerous choices of seafood from salmons, oysters, mussels, etc. But something came in my mind, i've read from somewhere that says G-Hotel's buffet isn't that worth the money. When i first took my bite on the oysters and mussels i notice it isn't that fresh and there was no second round for me after that. There were very few choices of cooked foods and some of the foods is cold =.=" It was quite a disappointing dinner for me as i look forward for it so much. It certainly not worth paying 80-100 for that dinner luckily it wasn't me who pay for it =P. Over all i would rate the environment 9/10 and the food 6/10. Here come the photos~

Photo Spam ^_^ V

A photo taken inside of G-Hotel(Click for bigger view).. coming soon.. G-Hotel buffet heeeheee...